Momma Said...

Day 8, Wednesday: A piece of advice you have for others. Anything at all.

A long time ago, my mom gave me an important piece of advice. "Don't ever talk about your husband in a negative way to your family, you might be able to forgive him, but we might not be able to." This advice is sound, although in certain situations difficult. She told me this when I was married to my first husband, with whom I had lots of conflict. And I guess it was good in a way in that it kept her insulated from the things I was dealing with. But hard for me not having a support system. I assumed that's all that advice meant.

There is another way of looking at it, though. I would never talk to anyone about Jeff in a negative way. I love him, and luckily our disagreements are almost non-existent. I also try to be careful about "joking" about traits he might have that are less than perfect... we're all less than perfect aren't we? Because I love him, I would never want anyone to see him in a negative light. I want to build him up. I want everyone to think of him in a positive way and know that he is amazing. Who cares if I don't like the way he puts the toilet roll on the holder, etc... negative statements, even in jest are still demeaning and hurtful.

So that's my best advice - honor the people you love, especially your husband, and guard ALL your words about them to preserve them and build them up.

Hugs,