Lions and Tigers and Bears... Oh My!
Sometimes I am very overcome with irrational fears, usually involving Jeff and the kids. I never knew fears like this before I had my little family. I don't like them to go anywhere without me in case something happens. If anything did happen, I would want us to be together. And if they do and I don't hear from them by the time I think they should be back, I start fearing the worst.
With the internet and the news, and the over reporting of horrific things happening in every corner of our country, I feel so inundated by all the heart-wrenching tragedies that seem to be constantly occurring. I fear losing them, and I fear them losing me. I cannot and do not want to imagine the horror of it. Sometimes it feels very overwhelming. And when it does, I just try to hug them more, and trust more that we will be safe. And together.
They say God never gives us more than we can bear, and I believe in God with all my heart. And I pray (plead) a lot that God never tests me in that way. Which I feel guilty about... is it wrong to hope that, or pray for that?
If so, then I know God forgives that in me. I just have to keep trusting as much as I can.